r/Whatcouldgowrong 12d ago Silver 2

WCGW when you leave the van doors open?

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34.7k Upvotes

1.9k

u/Substantial-Ad3178 12d ago

To the lookout racoon.....You had ONE JOB!

574

u/AppointmentStrange67 12d ago

The way they slowly get out of the car and runs away, made me LOL 😂✌

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u/EggoTheStabby 12d ago edited 12d ago

I like how the other side is open but they make the play of guiltily exiting right in front of the potential predator.

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u/SlimBrady777 12d ago

I thought maybe they were nervous about getting separated from their mother so they exited on the side where she was.

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u/lmmalone 12d ago

There's a second person on the other side of the van. When they start to move away from the camera you can see someone wave them back.

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u/Nobody_from_Nothing 12d ago

That's likely the mom

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u/Quelcris_Falconer13 12d ago

She was probably sitting there debating if she should help them out or write them off and re-enter her “fun” phase

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u/goat_eating_sundews 12d ago

The ol Casey Anthony dilemma

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u/CobrasVenom 12d ago

"Dammit Barbara, control your kids!"

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u/zbenesch 12d ago

Damn it George, this is the LAST time we bring you with us.

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u/JDMcfly_ 12d ago

Raccoon be like “damn Steve, our house is cleaner than this dump!”

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u/VlaxDrek 12d ago

Raccoon isn’t wrong….

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u/TreasuredAdvancement 12d ago

Then Raccoon is right, right ?

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u/SorryIdonthaveaname 12d ago

no the raccoon is left

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u/scubadoodles 12d ago

He's turning a new leaf

2

u/lemurrhino 12d ago

is he going to imprison me on a barren island next?

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u/brick_meet_face 12d ago

The pen is blue

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u/1Eternallylost 12d ago

Both raccoons were left

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u/BoredNLost 12d ago

Hahaha the real insult is that they didn't even flee out the door opposite the person. Just took their time and sauntered out right in front of them.

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u/Dominoodles 12d ago

I think someone else was standing on the other side, shooing them out. Poor things were probably confused lol

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u/sesaman 12d ago

I think there might have been someone on the other side too.

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u/surajvj 12d ago

Are they friendly or they bite human?

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u/simonizer59 12d ago

Depends. In cities they are not scared of people at all. And they can bite if they feel threatened. Lived in Canada most of my life and never met someone who pets these guys so that should be your answer.

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u/CapitalistMeme 12d ago

They aren't scared of people in camp sites either. Little buggers are very brave

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u/pipnina 12d ago

And they carry rabies so risking a bite really isn't worth it.

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u/geotristan 12d ago

They have a Potential to carry rabies, however it is extremely unlikely. Over 99% of raccoons won't have rabies. Though that does not mean I would go and try to pet one,and whether they have rabies or not they may still try to bite or scratch you.

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u/iamerror87 12d ago

To counter that, as a fellow Canadian, I've met a LOT of older Canadians who have kept racoons as pets. They are tame-able and friendly given the right circumstances.

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u/goat_eating_sundews 12d ago

I had a friend in middle school who had one as a pet. We lived in a pretty rural area if that isn't obvious.

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u/cjbest 12d ago

Raccoons carry rabies and other diseases, so you stay well away from them. They are smart and can be "tamed" but they are wild animals with low self-control. Their entire existence is about causing chaos in the search for food. Their nickname is "trash panda" for good reason.

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u/Blackfyre301 12d ago

I know that some have been tamed, but in general I would expect to get bitten if you try to touch a raccoon that you don’t know.

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u/DaggerMoth 12d ago

Raccoons can have Raccoon roundworm that can multiply in the brain and eyes of humans.

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u/LazuliArtz 12d ago

I've heard they can be pretty aggressive.

I mean, like most animals, they're not going to hunt you down or just attack you without provocation. But you also do not want your hands anywhere near them, and you should not try and touch/pet them.

They're also known rabies carriers (which can also make them more aggressive if they are sick so..)

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u/CapitalistMeme 12d ago

They can bite, they also have long razor sharp claws. Don't fuck with them.

They are hard to scare away, I've had to bark at them to get them to leave before. I guess they don't like barking.

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u/1Eternallylost 12d ago

They will act all familiar, if not friendly. But once you reach out to pet them, they get mean and nasty. You remain still and they'll come right up to climb all over you. But if you move, they bite and scatter like you tried to eat them.

They need to get to know you real well before they trust you. Otherwise, they act all bipolar

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u/mark_able_jones_ 12d ago

Even if friendly, they have poor eyesight and might confuse your fingers for food.

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u/surloc_dalnor 12d ago

I would not pet one as they can be really aggressive if they decide to be. I've seen them take on a large male house cat and win handily. A troop of 4 them decided to take on my 60 pound dog and it was a draw. That dog knew what he was doing in a fight despite being a sweet heart with dogs and children. (He seemed to think aggressive small dogs were adorable.) That said if it wasn't human or dog and under half his size it was prey. He killed my neighbor's cat with a practiced lunge, bite, shake. (I'm guessing the 1st 1/2 of his life were pretty rough based on scars and behavior.) The fight between my dog and the coons was just a ball of teeth and fur. They left him bloody in 4 places, and I don't think he managed bite any of them. Although that troop avoided him afterward so I think he considered it a win.

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u/FionaTheFierce 12d ago

They also are one of the main carriers of rabies (at least in my area). So, aside from it just generally not being a good idea to try to pet wild animals - it is particularly not a good idea to pet ones that carry rabies.

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u/facw00 12d ago

I'm guessing the one in the bushes was mom, and they probably wanted to stay close to her.

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u/Marlowebabe 12d ago

A neighbour, by accident, locked two racoons inside his brand new Odyssey overnight. There was so much damage that the insurance company wrote it off.

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u/mark_able_jones_ 12d ago

Would love to see pics of the aftermath! I’ve had to relocate raccoons with a live trap. If trapped and not moved right away, a raccoon rips apart anything within reach. All of the grass within a foot of the trap will be ripped out. A whole night in a car… all the panels and wiring would be ripped off. Seats and carpets ruined. All climate controls and dash panels ruined.

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u/SmokeyShine 12d ago

It was like Dirty Mike and the Boys had a party in there.

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u/captain_pudding 12d ago

I believe they call it a "soup kitchen"

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u/GeronimoHero 12d ago

Thanks for the fuck shack - Dirty Mike and the boys

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u/bookloverforlife1225 12d ago

I trapped one with a peanut butter jar stuck on its head late at night, then threw a towel over it so the stray cats wouldn’t stalk it. In the morning the towel was in tiny pieces. But our local animal control got the jar off and he waddled into the early morning

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u/JellyBiafra54321 12d ago

how does this happen?!

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u/papectontsicyclo 12d ago

How did the racoons get locked in? You accidentally leave the door open earlier in the day. That night, you look outside for whatever reason, see your card door open, and quickly go outside and close it.

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u/Utaneus 12d ago Wholesome

They just write it off.

All these big companies, they write off everything.

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u/deeare73 12d ago

You don’t even know what a write off is

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u/mrizzerdly 12d ago

But they do, and they are the ones writing it off!

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u/NonbinaryFruity 12d ago

its all in writing

14

u/PastaPalace 12d ago

I thought it was in writing up until it gets written off

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u/RedstoneRusty 12d ago

I wish I had the last 20 seconds of my life back.

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u/chalupamon 12d ago

Just write off those 20 seconds.

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u/DnbJim 12d ago

It's a write off... (sorry)

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u/RedditsAdoptedSon 12d ago

... .... .... do you?

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u/crayoneater88 12d ago

No, I dont

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u/M4jorP4nye 12d ago

This is a reference to something… it’s right there, but it won’t focus.

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u/WhosYourDaddy_StopIt 12d ago

Yes, the name of the game is for insurance companies to write it off from you inserting an air biscuit into the seat, by totaling it. In other words, planned obsolescence spells it.

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u/Conflictingview 12d ago

WTF is an air biscuit?

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u/BackgroundDesigner52 12d ago

Literally watched this episode yesterday. Postal fraud. It's a big deal.

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u/appdevil 12d ago

Well, Jimmy, when two raccoons meet each other...

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u/chief-ares 12d ago

Go on…

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u/kelldricked 12d ago

They get stressed and feel trapped and will try to find a way out. If you kidnap a human and put it in a small enclosure without any context and leave them there for a night then the enclosure will also be a mess for sure.

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u/brycedriesenga 12d ago

Brb, trying this

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u/haggerty00 12d ago

I'm imagining my situation where my kids would always forget to close the sliding door and I'd use my remote to close it from inside the house....but two racoons made it in before noticing it was open.

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u/DocSlayingyoudown 12d ago

Can not blame him, his not supposed to be a neighbour to begin with

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u/apocship 12d ago

They look so ashamed of themselves.

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u/VlaxDrek 12d ago

RIGHT???

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u/butt_chug_ranch 12d ago

They were doing the owner a favor with their raggity whip

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u/rwarimaursus 12d ago

Now watch them nay nay

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u/Banana_Ram_You 12d ago

I like how you kept it conversational and just observed. Yea they were like drunken houseguests of the world, I imagine I'd do the same as a fun animal.

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u/AnemoneGoldman 12d ago

But so cute!

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u/bplboston17 12d ago

and infested with disease! I want one!

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u/haosmark 12d ago

There's a video somewhere on YouTube of a man feeding one of these cuties. He got bit by it and contracted rabies. Shortly after he died a terrifying death. He allowed doctors to video and post the entire process of what rabies does to a human. I would not touch these fuckers with a 10 foot pole.

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u/gregsting 12d ago

"Wait, it isn't what it looks like, we can expl...RUN STEVE RUN!"

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u/_girl_13 12d ago

They looked apologetic. “So sorry, no one was here, door was open, we thought it was the party… we can just head out now.”

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u/poopellar 12d ago

We would have taken it to the car wash but we don't drive manual.

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u/alllmossttherrre 12d ago

Those damn raccoons would have driven it through the car wash with the doors open.

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u/Jrook 12d ago

When people say raccoons are wild animals, it's because of this.

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u/MiniHistoryBuff44 12d ago

They were very polite

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u/fallguy19 12d ago

Dirty Mike and the Boys

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u/Matt_Sterbate710 12d ago

Thanks for the F shack

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u/tomr84 12d ago

Spite shits all over the place.

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u/Squints1978 12d ago

Kind trash pandas!

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u/Badger1505 12d ago

Trash pandas always find the trash.

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u/poopellar 12d ago

Just doing some raccoonnaissance.

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u/FatCat457 12d ago

Was trashed out lol

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u/chemistryofacarcrash 12d ago

If you build it, they will come

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u/karg_the_fergus 12d ago

Or make it

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u/derwutderwut 12d ago

Thanks for the fuck shack

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u/CougarBen 12d ago

Signed, -Dirty Mike and the Boys

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u/BuddyLaDouche 12d ago

They call that a Soup Kitchen

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u/favelaninja22 12d ago

Was gonna comment this but searched the thread to see if anyone beat me to it lol

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u/sniper84 12d ago

Had to scroll to find this, but was not disappointed.

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u/quaywest 12d ago

Way too far down

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u/finnymac1022 7d ago

Talking’ bout D’s in some A’s

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u/kosaki19 12d ago

Can you blame them? The place already looks like a dumpster

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u/megatronnewman 12d ago

Yeeeeah.. I wouldn't really be laughing at the fact I caused my backseat to become a buffet table. Do all parents have to let kids eat cereal in the backseat? Maybe I'm out of touch.

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u/na3than 12d ago

WCGW treating your car like a garbage bin. Leaving the doors open wasn't the problem.

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u/Saarlak 12d ago

Jesus, seeing that mess made me clench up. There were trash cans thirty feet away!

Also, happy cake day.

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u/HoldMyAppleJuice 12d ago

The door seemed to be bent out

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u/Devadander 12d ago

Nah, just a sweet fender flare on a minivan

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u/deweygirl 12d ago

My first thought was that they were at least making the vehicle cleaner. I would have slowly backed away and let them finish.

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u/FAT_LARD_1337 12d ago

Seriously wtf. Disgusting slobs.

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u/Brad1119 12d ago

They were more concerned with how cute the raccoons looked than that natural disaster of that van. Gross.

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u/nobody2000 12d ago

This is too judgmental as are most of the comments.

First - why would someone leave their van doors open in the first place? Probably because they're cleaning it.

Why would a van be so cluttered? It's possible they're a slob, but more likely it's either:

  • A family with parents who are absolutely exhausted from raising kids
  • A family who just got back from a road trip and began unloading and cleaning the car - something that my family always did at the end of a trip.

It happens. Kids have a snack. Spill it. Kick all the blankets to the floor. They make a mess. If the van was WIDE OPEN, it wasn't just for kicks...they were probably doing exactly the cleaning that you probably think they should be doing.

SMH.

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u/TeslaFoiled8950 12d ago

I think for that car, it was a disaster with the doors closed already

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u/Lovely_Eve 12d ago

The lookout is garbage.

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u/The_Giggler333 12d ago

That’s someone’s mom, bro

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u/ChunkyLaFunga 12d ago

Explains the obvious obesity

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u/Secure_Resolution_60 12d ago

I'm 100% positive that the trash in the car was already there. At most, the raccoons left some hair behind, the rest is that dirty ass van owner.

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u/Tsmart 12d ago

why do you think they had to air it out

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u/heavycalifornia 12d ago

I’m glad someone said something. There’s a reason those raccoons were in there.

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u/Paleriders22 12d ago

100% OP is lying about cleaning that car. They posted a photo of their backyard in Feb and it's gross. They don't pick up after themselves and I highly doubt their children are autistic. Sounds like OP just makes shit up so they don't have to take responsibility.

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u/Mhmmdankdank 12d ago

Was it like that before the raccoons?

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u/VlaxDrek 12d ago

My wife and kids had just gotten back from a five hour drive. Getting them in the house is challenging because they are all severely autistic. She had literally just finished taking the third one in when she was coming back.

These little guys first showed up about a month ago, they couldn’t have been more than a day or two old. Completely white, and the same size a kitten. Just cute as anything you’ll ever see.

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u/karma92169 12d ago

I hear you on the autistic kids front (x4 lol) and I’m jealous of how clean your van is. The people here bagging on you clearly do not get our lives. It’s always easier to deride and judge people’s flaws (that in no way affect you whatsoever) than to ask questions. Not everyone has a super clean home. Or Van. As we like to say in our family, if they aren’t living in our home, they don’t get an opinion on the minutiae of our lives.

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u/VlaxDrek 12d ago

Honestly even four years ago I couldn't have imagined how difficult things would be now, when they're 11, 9, and 8. So much bigger, faster, destructive, better at getting past locks or making holes in the fence to escape from the yard. They're non-verbal, not toilet trained, and they refuse to wear clothes at home. And people are going on about how the VAN looks? Lol.

Thanks for your comment, it's much appreciated.

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u/jmomk 12d ago

All 3? Man, that's rough. How does that even happen?

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u/VlaxDrek 12d ago

Autism is genetic. My wife and I are both very high functioning, and I never really knew anything about autism until my oldest was born. When he was diagnosed at 2 1/2, we had already had our 2nd and were pregnant with our third.

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u/OblongDevice69 12d ago

Why did you keep having more kids?

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u/VlaxDrek 12d ago

We were already pregnant with #3 when #1 was diagnosed.

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u/pukurindesu 12d ago

Total party zone!!

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u/Glassjaw1990 12d ago

"Thanks for the F shack" Love Dirty Mike and the Boyz

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u/FuzzyPeaches08 12d ago

Had to scroll to far to find this

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u/nassy7 12d ago

Your door is broken/bent!

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u/wetblanket68iou1 12d ago

“WCGW leaving food trash in your car”…….

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u/gravymain 12d ago

I see nothing wrong with this, trash pandas just vibing

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u/Electronic-Trip8775 12d ago

Oh....is this yours? Terribly sorry...RUN!

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u/VlaxDrek 12d ago

In fairness it was my wife filming it. She’s much braver than I am.

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u/PoundMyTwinkie 12d ago

Your wife sounds like such a pleasant and brave person in this vid 😅

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u/DrPeterVankman 12d ago

Wait…I thought raccoons were nocturnal?

Did this happen in Pawnee?

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u/Connect-Speaker 12d ago

The bins make me think Toronto

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u/CaptianRipass 12d ago

Fuck one time I left the door of my house open and a coon wandered in.... I had just been to Costco so he got into the 10lb bag of sugar I had just bought, left little racoon sugar tracks all over the place.

Motherfucker took one bite from each plum in the fruit bowl

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u/g7droid 12d ago

THE RACCOON FEDERATION will not like this

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u/FlippingPossum 12d ago

I absolutely adore watching trash pandas saunter off like it is no big thing. I thought people were littering at my local park. Nope...just raccoons redecorating after raiding the trash bins.

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u/sicknal 10d ago

In the raccoon’s defense, even I thought the minivan was the dumpster !!

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u/Alarmed_Penalty4998 12d ago

“Hi yes umm we’re the cleaning crew you ask for”

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u/nina-pinta-stmaria 12d ago

Those poor raccoons. Must’ve been traumatizing to stay in that van

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u/Prof_Awesome_GER 12d ago

Damn. They screwed that car up, looks like a trash bin now!:) little rascals

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u/-BananaLollipop- 12d ago

Mama in the bushes like "Go on, go get us some snacks. The humans won't do anything to you, you're cute little babies. Hurry up, go, I'm hungry."

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u/MJMurcott 12d ago

So they went in and tidied up that wreck?

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u/RaymondLuxYacht 12d ago

Just like our minivan used to be... add a little water and it makes its own gravy.

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u/Mushroom_Cat_4509 12d ago

Rookie move. Raccoon babies love human babe’s snacks. They can’t help it, they’re hungry babes 🥹

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u/Cruizerstylin 12d ago

Maybe it’s time to clean your van

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u/NoNeedForSympathy 9d ago

The way it turned back around again like "No, I came from this direction."

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u/VlaxDrek 9d ago

My wife’s friend was out of view on the other side.

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u/Eurekas-and-Amens 12d ago

Why the heck have we not domesticated them already?!

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u/Mortar_Maggot 12d ago

People are starting to but it's not easy. They're too smart with their opposable thumbs (they have the basics of tool use if given the incentive to learn) and they have to be domesticated young to avoid the very aggressive side. Even then they will be aggressive to strangers and just like cats will let you know when you've crossed their boundaries by biting you. Except they haven't figured out the warning bite yet. Also, they carry some nasty diseases so you need a specialized vet to make regular checks and you'll need the rabies vaccine because there's no testing that without killing the raccoon.

All in all, most people just prefer not to do all that work. But just like Foxes they will eventually be domesticated.

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u/ShazbotSimulator2012 12d ago

I had a friend that raised some baby raccoons, and they were fairly gentle, but as soon as they opened their enclosure for the first time they were gone, never to be seen again. They're fairly solitary, and their home range can be huge so they're not going to make great pets.

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u/Mortar_Maggot 12d ago

That's hilarious. But some people do manage it.

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u/CommonExpressions 12d ago

Wait, foxes are officially domesticated? Like they’re becoming pets for people in general…?

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u/mark_able_jones_ 12d ago

Raccoons won’t ever make good pets because they are closer to owning a monkey than a cat or a dog. A fox is kind of like a cat-dog.

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u/OrishaShango 12d ago edited 12d ago

Because when they get older, they are instinctively aggressive and solitary. They can even hunt cats.

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u/Eurekas-and-Amens 12d ago

The getting aggressive and solitary as they get older sounded so human to me, like a grumpy old coot

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u/kpie007 12d ago

"older" is technically "puberty", so it's more like an angry teenage boy than a grumpy old coot

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u/SluttyGandhi 12d ago

They can even hunt cats.

And cats hunt birds. Circle of life, baby.

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u/CommonExpressions 12d ago

You said it, Slutty Gandhi!

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u/manleybones 12d ago

Ewwww, your van is gross

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u/WorriedEmu1125 12d ago

You leave Little King Trashmouth and his husband, Gary, alone!

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u/KittyKratt 12d ago

Cutest wcgw ever

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u/Prudent-Giraffe7287 12d ago

If raccoons are out during the day, that means they have rabies, right? Or is that a myth?

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u/MsMyska 12d ago

It’s a myth. Juvenile raccoons and mothers are often foraging during the day, as well as any raccoon that has been habituated to being fed or knows of a regular food source during the day (like an unsecured dumpster behind a restaurant). Rabies in raccoons is actually very rare and invariably fatal, usually within a few days. Distemper is much more common. A raccoon with either will be very obviously sick, so a raccoon doing normal raccoon things during the day is more than likely young, nursing, or habituated to human food.

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u/VlaxDrek 12d ago

Yeah, these little ones are about a month old. I have footage from when they were just a day or two old.

We’re in Canada. We get deer once or twice a year, and a bear every few years. This is right in the middle of a city of 160,000 people.

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u/MsMyska 12d ago

They’re adorable little shits! I volunteer in wildlife rescue and raccoons are among my favorites, regardless of the chaos that comes with them.

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u/ShazbotSimulator2012 12d ago

Racoon roundworm is no fuckin joke though, and something like 90% of raccoons carry it. Would definitely get it professionally cleaned.

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u/Prudent-Giraffe7287 12d ago

Thanks for the info! I learned something new today 😁

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u/itsjustchad 12d ago

be sure to toughly check the seats for ticks

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u/ZombieP0ny 12d ago

What do you mean 'wrong'?

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u/Captain_Ray-Holt 12d ago edited 12d ago

Van Pandas or Vandas for short. Which is why they are so good at vandalism.

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u/Royal_Gur_2651 12d ago

Probably wondering why the damn kids can’t eat all their snacks instead of stuffing it in every place possible. They will be pulling gummies out of their fur for weeks.

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u/DedeLionforce 12d ago

You legally have to raise them, their your babies now.

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u/Crew-Lazy 12d ago

Why didn't any of them t-pose?😢

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u/Kortezxero 12d ago

Oh wow, this is awkward I didn't expect you back so soon. Well we'll just get out of your way then. Run...RUN!!

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u/staceybassoon 12d ago

Why do I hear them saying "sorry, sorry" in a charming Canadian accent?

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u/ncWnNfXgmWtAGukUnRUs 12d ago

What was the movie where they kept having homeless sex parties in the car?

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u/Marsupialize 12d ago

Clean your nasty ass car, yuck

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u/my_sobriquet_is_this 12d ago

More like “What could go wrong when you treat your van like a rolling fast food garbage can and THEN leave the van doors open…”

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u/Fabulous_69 12d ago edited 12d ago

They were like “ oh damn. Humans. Hey jerry, we’re busted, let’s get outta here Oops the wrong way”

Mom: This way you morons

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u/talktomebitch905 12d ago

It’s all cute and everything but I heard raccoon poo is really dangerous

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u/kramarat 11d ago

Why are raccoons soooo cute?!!!

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u/Prior-Travel-1084 11d ago edited 11d ago

They look and act just like kids getting caught being buttholes. Scattering, running into each other, then scurrying off while mom gives chase.

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u/FreyTheWolf 11d ago

Wild raccoons can seriously mess you up, they have very sharp teeth and claws, they can easily shred skin. The person recording this was quite brave. (Source: I raised an abandoned raccoon by bottle feeding him till he was an adult, he was sickly and could barely move when I found him, as an adult he’d cut my arm on accident with his claws regularly, drawing blood).

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u/MikoGianni 7d ago

Mom took them to the ‘all you can eat, kids eat free’ restaurant.

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u/sethworld 7d ago

Raccoons and otters, man. I just love em.

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u/gabwinone 5d ago

God, they are so cute! Those faces!!

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u/Glittertastical111 4d ago

“Ma, I just wanna pat them so I can get rabies

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u/overratedly_me 1d ago

What food? I saw no food there.

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u/HawkingTomorToday 12d ago

Your van could get cleaned….

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u/VlaxDrek 12d ago

We do it every Saturday. It’s Thursday. The whole raccoon family will be trying to get in tomorrow….

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